As much as the world loves to classify things, I am a bit hesitant when things are polar opposites. I don’t like to stick people in boxes and I think it’s likely that most of us live on a kind of spectrum where it depends on our sleep, quality of food and company as to if we are actually introverted or extroverted. I’ve never liked Myers-Briggs or Enneagrams, both for the boxes they put people in, the boxes that people then believe to be THEM without wavering, and the fact that every time I take one, I get a different frigging result. Which makes me look at it like a useless scam. BUT, I am a “what works for you” person. If you find value in these activities, then that’s good. So far the introvert/extrovert divide is the one that has been the most useful to me. The other year I was recommended “Quiet” by Susan Cain by a friend and it hit home in a lot of areas for me, even if the content is extremely culturally focused on the USA.
I Am An Introverted Extrovert
This article was shared on Facebook recently and it really is me a lot of the time. I like to go out. But I reach a maximum capacity very easily and then I swap into NOPE mode, which means I just want to go home and be alone.
I’ve been to all extremes on this spectrum, I really have. I’ve had nights when I wish others would stay up talking and having fun with me. I’ve also had nights where people have been over, gone out for drinks at the pub while I stayed home and I’ve locked them out of the house because I was in a severe NOPE phase and didn’t want to be around anyone else.
See, giant spectrum, though I think those are the two most extreme examples. Most of the time I’m ok to go out for an hour or two, very occasionally. Then I just get tired. I hate yelling over noise in cafes or pubs. I get bored smiling my way through things I can’t hear and it makes me leave. I love it when a small group of people get together and can properly catch up.
I think the thing I dislike the most about using the word introvert is that it’s so badly misunderstood these days. Kind of like the word feminism is. An introvert is not necessarily shy, scared of public speaking, meek or lacking in confidence. I am none of those things. I do, however, recharge at home. I don’t have the energy to pretend I want to be out or that I’m having a good time if I’m not.
Do you think people understand the word introvert properly? Where do you sit on this spectrum?
Linking up with My Home Truths and The Multitasking Woman.
Yes I think the word introvert is misunderstood as well. I am an extrovert and think that can be misunderstand to. We don’t have to be the life of the party but we like to socialise, be around people to get energy.
Extroverted introvert here. Although, I’m not even sure if that suits me. I too and not a fan of the one extreme to the other. I’m sure there are a lot of people like myself that swing between the two when needed.
You make a very good point about labels and the value of these kinds of tests. Most people probably are a bit of both and on a kind of spectrum, as you say. I consider myself to be an extreme introvert. Sadly, I can’t deny that I am also shy and lacking in confidence, but I can see how those labels would rankle with other introverts who aren’t. Introversion is definitely completely different from shyness. Great post.
I agree – people have the wrong idea about introverts. Both hubster and I fall right in the middle. People think I’m an extrovert because I can be very bubbly and outgoing, but I draw my strength from alone time!
I think people have this idea that being introvert is bad. I read a post last year about how a mother was disappointed because her daughter was an introvert. It was really awful because it bought into a lot of the meek and mild stereotypes.
Oh I can so agree with this!! My line between having fun and needing out, is very thin and I can reach it very quickly!! Once I’m done, I am well and truly done!