Life is a very big ride of ups and downs. You might even call it a rollercoaster, but if you’ve ever seen me bored in a game of Rollercoaster Tycoon, that’s not a good thing. I push the limits of game physics and kinda crash things. Of course that’s probably less funny after the Dreamworld disaster. Anyway. At least I do it in a virtual environment instead of with real guests. 

 

Yesterday Vs Today

 

Yesterday was a good day, if odd. I left work early to visit my doctor, who wanted to review me before I left workcover. I had a smooth run home, so smooth that I got to the doctors an hour before the appointment. Conveniently, my gym is next door. I hadn’t been to the gym on Tuesday like I had planned, so I figured… going to the gym now.

 

I got changed, sat on a bike to do some cycling. Saw that I had a missed call while I was getting changed. Thought it looked like a local landline number. Assumed it was the doctors calling to tell me my appointment was cancelled or something. Tried to call it back, but it was engaged. Ignored the call and started to bike. About one minute later, the guy on the gym desk came up to me and said someone was here. It was the medical receptionist from across the hall. Turns out the patient ahead of me had cancelled and they wanted to see if I would see the doctor now. They had called our home phone and found out from Ben that I was at the gym, so they came to get me. 

 

Jumped off bike, grabbed my bag from the locker and went to see my doctor. Much like my physio, he’s happy with my mobility and progress healing.

 

My medical team are happier than I am. I still feel odd that there are some shooting pains at times, but I’m told that is somewhat to be expected with increased use. Anyway, we have at least 4 other follow up things we can try in a month or two if I’m still getting pain. I just find the grey area of leaving workcover when I haven’t healed from it odd, even though i can do the large majority of my job. So I guess in their eyes I’m “fit for work” and in my eyes I’m “achey and painey lost so much fitness for the months I struggled to move”. I guess *I* don’t matter much to an insurer though.

 

Anyway, I did a gentle 15 on the bike and a gentle 15 on the epill-whatever-the-hell it’s called. I was uncomfortable by the time I finished and spent the evening hugging heat packs. 

 

Today was not a good day. I snapped at both Ben and Vala before I left for work. Not like me at all. I was cranky all day. I couldn’t snap myself out of it. So much so that I was actually annoying myself with my ability to not get over my mood.

 

I asked for help. A few people suggested I take myself out for lunch. So I did. It helped. A bit. But not enough. I was so tired. I cried half the way home. I got home and cried in my study on my new couch. Then I felt a bit better. Enough to go have a bath. I bought a copy of Big Magic in an op shop a few weeks ago and while I find that type of thing a bit woo at times, it does spark ideas in me. So I read in the bath and even wrote a few notes. 

 

I’m finally a bit better than I was at the start of the day.

 

A bit.