To be honest, I’d probably be super pissed if I saw this being written, so bear with me if you’re also feeling pissed at this title.

 

Positives of Exhaustion

 

My current super fun exhaustion is vitamin d deficiency. Muscle pain is so great. When I have a day where I hit about 9000 steps and 9 flights of stairs, I was in agony at the end of the day. FUN.

 

It has left me with little patience, energy and general capacity to DEAL for anything other than eating and work. 

 

Sometimes that lack of energy is bad:

 

 

Today’s fatigue level = feet hurt from having a bath. Thinking I won’t be doing much this weekend.

— Vanessa Smith (@normal_ness) September 6, 2019

But in other aspects of your life, I’m finding it to be a positive. Mostly the lack of being able to give a shit. It’s a nice filter to have, even if the lack of energy reason associated with it isn’t great fun. 

 

I was mindlessly spending time scrolling facebook, as you do, and I wondered why on earth I was in some groups. One in particular had been great back in the day but basically lacked all engagement and community now. That was the stuff I loved about it. Now it’s just kind of dead. But I felt attached to what it was and hadn’t left the group.

 

And then I realised, what a ridiculous waste of energy. And left the group.

 

I’ve done the same on other platforms. I seem to have developed a habit of hiding, snoozing, muting people – temporary measures – when I don’t like or don’t want to see things. I don’t know why. I’ve started unfollowing people. Sometimes they’re lovely people but I just don’t want to see that much politics becuase it’s too fucking depressing. Sometimes they were racist assholes.

 

And I know, none of this is groundbreaking. Sometimes it’s just an external factor in your life that kicks you up the metaphorical ass to fix things properly.

 

Maybe I just needed to find a silver lining to carry me through some of this exhaustion.