Wishful thinking mode? Desperation mode? Or wannabe mode?
At the height of the blogging era I remember wannabe mode as people who were DESPERATE to get a link on a famous site. A single link. That link would launch them into becoming the next big thing and all their problems would be over forever.
In blogging I remember it as a lot of people who told you that you weren’t serious about blogging if you didn’t drop ten grand on a website template (that looked the same as everyone else’s website template).
In writing groups it’s advice to never change genres, or daring to make the cover of your book yourself.
People who cling to the SINGLE THING for their validation or future. And then they hate you if you break their pointless rule.
We all have internal rules. Some rules are way more important than others.
Creativity is a unique topic for rules. There’s little in creativity that will actively harm others if you break the rules. Of course people can be assholes and display racism and ableism and lots of the other isms out there, but that’s not the type of harms that usually arise in the wannabe rule mode.
Wannabe rule mode is when you break the tiniest of perceived rules and the weight of people who MUST FOLLOW THE RULES AT ALL COSTS comes crashing down on you.
And when this crash (tantrum) of rules fall down on you, I find it’s only the genuine doers who are actually capable of having a conversation about it.
They’ve been through it. They’ve seen the pros and cons. They have the experience and knowledge, not just opinion. And because they have that first hand experience, they don’t tend to scream at you for a perceived slight.
I have absolutely been in wannabe mode.
I’ve wanted that one person to notice me, that one person to share something of mine, the dream that all it takes is that one influential person for my life to entirely change.
I can’t remember what got me out of that stage though, which is kind of frustrating. I wish I knew, because I wish I could help others move out of that stage. I think moving out of Wannabe Mode is good for creatives of all types, let alone humans in general. We are hopefully more authentically displaying our work when we leave Wannabe Mode.
