Ugh, it’s that time again

Today I am sad.

 

I’ve had a feeling for a while that there won’t be good news at work this year with regards to funding (it’s probably all public knowledge technically but I don’t view it as my place to share the specifics, so I’m not going into detail about why I feel this way). So today I resigned myself to the fact I have to job hunt again. Like… now.

 

Last time I job hunted it was a lot of verbal abuse, so I’m really not looking forward to it. This evening I finished knocking out a bunch of applications. Probably got about 20 done. Thankfully I have a good system so it takes up as little of my energy as possible to apply. But applying isn’t really where the energy suck is, though of course much of that could be improved too.

 

Abuse? Yes. I have a highly completive resume but I am housebound so people get mad at me for needing to do my desk job from my desk, instead of their desk.

 

Yes, people will phone you to yell abuse at you for applying for a job while disabled. We have severe attitudinal issues towards people with a disability in Australia.

 

Last time I job hunting I wrote nearly a books worth about what I went through. I had a lot of plans for that book. But unfortunately it was a highly traumatising time which lowered by baseline permanently and I’ve been unable to reread my own works for the purpose of publishing.

 

Despite my skills, degrees, experience, references and whatnot, it takes months for me to find new (non discriminatory) work, so I simply have to start looking months earlier than a non housebound person does. I will likely face periods of unemployment in which I cannot access unemployment benefits because Centrelink do not understand “highly skilled but housebound”. If at any time in future months you have capacity to support me in a financial way, that will be put aside for keeping a roof over my head while unemployed. Unfortunately most of my medications are not on the PBS, and with a pile of food sensitivities I cannot cut corners in the way most people can to save in advance of a bad situation like this.

 

While I do have businesses set up (this and this), unfortunately I do not have capacity to build them while working full time, nor do I earn enough to save a buffer to build them when my job winds up. The most I can do is keep them in maintenance mode at the moment. MECFS is quite incompatible with the realities of life under capitalism.

 

If you’ve ever wondered why I am open to talking about things like this, it’s because the fault does not sit with me, the fault sits with inaccessible employment and lack of appropriate disability supports (which includes money). I am not ashamed. This situation is merely facts to me. Exhausting facts, most certainly, but merely facts. I know most people would not speak up on these topics and this is why I think it’s even more important that I do.

 

It’s that time again. I’m not looking forward to abuse, or having my baseline lowered any further.

 

Wish me all the luck you can spare.