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This website is the only place which has the script for the episode.
I know some platforms and apps have automatic transcriptions but I cannot endorse AI and will not take responsibility for their accuracy.
Episode Script:
Welcome to The Second Time Podcast. I’m Vanessa Smith. This is my weekly update on how job hunting is going – it’s the end of my 12th week of job hunting.
Objectively Pointless is my phrase of the week. That’s how it feels, knowing that less than 1% of what I do each week is likely to have the desired outcome (you know, a job).
Anger is also a large feeling this week. I find it weird people don’t acknowledge they feel anger. Anger doesn’t have to mean violence or anything like that, only some definitions of the word anger include violence. Some days, anger is just anger. Another feeling, the same way joy is another feeling. You’re not a better or safer person if you pretend you don’t feel anger.
I wanted to talk about a few things this week – an investigative journalism podcast I’ve been listening to which is a large business failure. How all these supposed business experts failed because they forgot Business 101 type principles. An article a friend sent me about people being rejected legally from working from home more of the week. But I just don’t have it in me to analyse them this week. All these ignorant approaches just make me feel like the anger is piling on me; I’m feeling the injustices and discrimination more heavily.
I don’t have any interest in justifying my disability needs, or my skills or anything right now – to anyone. No one seems interested in facts, only their personal whims. That makes me angry and it makes everything feel objectively pointless.
I think some types will be embarrassed for me for talking about these things in this episode.
But, I think it’s weird to pretend we don’t have feelings. I think it’s weird that emotional intelligence has been bastardised by HR types to mean “be an unfeeling robot for the convenience of a business”. I think it’s weird to pretend that job hunting is pleasant for anyone, let alone someone who knows they’re being actively discriminated against each and every day. Can we not just openly admit this is all a bit shit? Do we have to write fan fiction about ourselves and pretend this is somehow fun?
I had a rare honest phone call this week. Someone called me on Wednesday to arrange an interview for Friday. I agreed. Then they said they’d text me the location. I asked if they had read the part of my resume where it says I have to work from home due to disability. They said they had not. They admitted they just skim for the information they need. We obviously did not go ahead with the interview. I don’t know if their need for onsite work was genuine or not – I never even caught the company name. However, I greatly appreciate honesty and I like that the person admitted they just skimmed my resume. It’s rare that people are this honest, which by the way, I consider to be a basic level of honesty.
One pattern I’m observing in this round of job hunting is the lowering of pay.
A job I saw this week was for someone with a background of successfully implementing ISO management systems. They wanted to pay from $30 an hour. So they wanted an expert for barely more than minimum wage? Good luck with that.
This is an example of the kind of nonsense you have to wade through to find the reasonable, sustainable jobs.
Part of my outplacement services that came with my redundancy is a place where I can work with a job coach. I’ve booked in with them for next week, specifically requesting help with the “practical aspects of being discriminated against” and asked them “what can I do to make an employer hire me? To make them understand they are behaving in a discriminatory manner?”. I don’t know if the person the company suggested is disabled or has any literacy on disability topics. Wish me luck for next week – I hope they have something valuable to say, but to be honest, most people don’t. I’m curious how it will go.
(I don’t feel great today and completely forgot to include the mutual aid segment. I’ll do it next week.)
Recorded and edited by myself, Vanessa Smith.
Intro and outro music by Ben Dawson.
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i’m homeless with severe me and don’t have much longer. this is unsolicited advice so feel free to ignore, just know i thought it might be worth sharing with the last of my energy before the world takes me. have you considered being a live in aide for another disabled person? the incredibly lucky disabled people who have HCV often need them which can mean your shelter is much cheaper/free. the pay is low but the certification is very short and there’s always demand. finding a spoonie with similar needs might make the actual workload manageable/be more sustainable. like just thinking of myself i mostly need help with food prep, bringing food/water, brining in/putting away groceries, making calls once in a while. meanwhile most of the rest of the time i really wouldn’t need anything else because i’d be resting….which would mean you could rest too. good luck out there.
Hey, thank you so much for using your precious energy to comment. Unfortunately that type of set up would be too much exertion for me, I’m closer to needing a carer than being able to be one. I also take precautions against airborne illnesses due to the risk of deterioration, and don’t like people being in my space due to some stuff in my past.