Mental health was not something that was really discussed in my life. I don’t remember it being stigmatised as such, but I also don’t think it was spoken about. I was kind of brought up to know people have problems “in their heads” but that you either had big problems or no problems. (Maybe that is stigmatism?)
Kelly’s post yesterday made me realise how far I’ve come. I’m utterly buggered this week. I don’t know why, but I just am. No amount of sleep is enough. No food (good or bad) is giving me energy. I’m just having a tired out week.
I feel the worst , think the worst and act the worst when I’m tired. I worry more. And I started doing that on Monday evening on my way home from work. I can’t even remember what I was worrying about now. But I worked on it. As soon as I found myself worrying about whatever stupid thing it was, I realised I was very tired. And that the tiredness was what I had to tackle, not whatever stupid thing my brain decided to worry about.
My original tag line for this blog included things like healthy eating, exercise and positive thinking. I removed them a while back, because I haven’t ended up blogging about them on their own much. But even the thought that I might blog a lot about any of those topics has really helped me to just be aware of things I can do to help myself think more positively. Sometimes that’s a lot of the battle.
I’m fairly naturally cynical and sarcastic, so some of the more woo woo, ultra positive stuff on the internet or in the self help arena makes me roll my eyes and fake vomiting. But you can be cynical, sarcastic and positive, even if it sounds kind of counter intuitive. It’s more about finding what works for you and using it. If woo woo works for you, use it. If it makes you dry retch, then move on and find what does work for you.
In all areas of life, there’s one thing I believe: there is no one size fits all solution. Which is probably why most diet fads fail.
Which brings me to other parts of my health. Namely, exercise. Man, have I let that slide. When I was reading Chris Guillebeau’s book The Art of Non-Conformity recently there was an exercise about mapping out your ideal day. And one of the things that clicked in my head as I read this: I want to do a different type of exercise every day. Kayaking one day. Stand up paddle-boarding the next. Cycling. Walking. Maybe a dance lesson (though who knows what style). Exercise is not something that I feel the need to be a specialist in. It’s something I want to enjoy and learn about.
Of course, three out of those five things cost money, which is what I don’ t have right now. I do have a bike and some legs though. And I’m still not cycling or walking. I would say I need an exercise buddy to ‘motivate’ me, but putting more pressure on me is more likely to make me say ‘stuff this’ and not do it. My brain is stubborn.
One day I’ll work out the way to make myself develop the exercising habit.
How do you go about your physical exercise? Do you find being aware of why you’re having certain thoughts to help “control” them?