It seems like my extreme skill recently is getting into a small funk. They don’t last long but they’re tiring.
All The (minor) Funks
I already had a case of the nopes at the start of June, where too much happened in a short period of time and I was too tired to deal. Yesterday I had it again. A combination of sinus pain, food for dinner Sunday night that didn’t agree with me, and being tired from shoulder pain… I woke up Monday morning and just wanted more sleep.
And that was even after I reached one of my “I know I’m exhausted” trigger points – when I fall asleep on the couch and Ben can’t even wake me up to get me to brush my teeth or walk to the bed. I know he’s talking to me, and I can hear and understand him, but my brain writes it off as less important than sleep. So I sleep.
That used to happen a lot to me, but ever since I improved my sleep patterns a few years ago, it’s pretty rare. So when it does happen, I can now take it as a sign to rest more/sleep more/do less stuff. Having said that, two sets of nopes in one month doesn’t feel “acceptable” to me. But what is acceptable?
I’m really not good at resting. Over the weekend I tried to do as little as possible to rest and reserve my energy. But that kind of depressed me. I don’t want to spend “my” days saving my energy for work days, and work days are for “others”. I’m far too selfish for that. This isn’t to say I hate my job or anything, I’ve got no problems with my job, I think I just wish it took up less hours of my week in commuting.
Or I’m just wiped out. Last week I had an errand or something on every single night after work. By Friday I was pretty mad. I don’t like doing things after work on the weekdays. I barely have any time at home awake during the week as it is. The week before last was pretty busy too, with CT scans and car service and other things. I guess maybe I’m just tired off the back of two busy weeks. I hate busy and I hate being tired.
It Hasn’t Been All Bad
I bought a secondhand, awesome new bag on the weekend. And all the thing that have gone on, well, they all needed to happen. It is nice to be ticking off things I neglected for two years while I was working part time and too poor to get necessary things done. I guess I wish I could remember that it’s nice to get things done. Or that getting things done energised me instead of drained me. Maybe that’s it. I’ve done too much energy draining things and not enough energy giving things. I had a giant pile of books out from the library for my staycation, and I’ve read exactly two of them. Maybe it’s time I made reading a goal for a week to make more “me” time and energy.
Do you struggle to balance what gives you energy vs what needs to be done?