Self Care For Lazy, Sarcastic, Blunt People

Self Care For Lazy, Sarcastic, Blunt People

I’m not religious, but I like hot cross buns and I finally get paid for public holidays, so I’m all for the Easter long weekend. Which, FYI, is this week!! Four whole days of doing nothing. Which brings me to the topic at hand today…


Self Care For Lazy, Sarcastic, Blunt People


Normally I would disclaimer my ass with something about not being an expert to talk about self care. I guess that part is true. But I’m going to claim expert status at the lazy, sarcastic and blunt part. (Though, to tell you the truth, I’m wondering if I am lazy. I can move my pinkie finger to use the indicator on my car when I’m turning and merging and stuff, so I think I’m already less lazy than 50% of the population.)


I’m sure a retreat at some special wellness and relaxation place would be really good (though they also seem to have a lot of rules from the few times I’ve ever google them and sworn at price tags, which seems to defeat that whole relax thing if you have to keep remembering new rules) but just because 1000’s of spare dollars don’t drop into the toilet too often, doesn’t mean you can’t self-care yourself.


Self Care For Lazy, Sarcastic, Blunt People


1) Find your thing

You need to put some effort into this part of your laziness. You need to find what relaxes you. For me, I enjoy watching reruns of TV shows on DVD. (Not Netflix, not TV, on DVD – no ads and no buffering on shithouse internet.) This part will require a lot of dedication in trying out different types of laziness. I suggest dedicating multiple weekends to this. If you’re really dedicated you’ll ignore the kids, not run errands and become a master of sloth.


2) Know what bothers you

Do you need to be alone with your thing for it to really work? Do you need a clean room/house/blanket fort? Know what you need to help you with your thing and make sure you know how you will tackle it. My thing is making a nest. I like to drag our mattress in front of the TV and flop on it. I am more likely to stay still and control my shiny object syndrome if I’m on a mattress than a couch. Don’t know why, but it works for me.


Related: Perfect Elements For A Lazy Weekend


3) Tackle the last obstacles

What thing always comes up and interrupts your time? What can you do to prevent it?


4) Laze

Now that you’ve put all the effort into lazing, you need to actually do it. Lazing is not bad. Lazing is good for you. We all need down time.


How do you find a lazy way of incorporating self care into your life?


(Please don’t suggest essential oils. I am so sick of seeing them on Instagram. I will throw anyone who mentions essential oils in a toaster.) 


*waits to see which person is a rebel and wants to be in a toaster*


12 Replies to “Self Care For Lazy, Sarcastic, Blunt People”

  1. Ha – essential oils was going around over a decade ago. That phase is done around here!

    For me, it’s reading. I need to read every single day to stay sane. Not learning-about-stuff reading though (non-fiction reading is SO boring!). It has to be the escape-reality kind of reading. Only fiction will do. And my time to read is when I hope into bed. I have to say though, I like my fiction clean, so even though I read almost every genre known to man quite happily, I rarely read in the general market, unless I know the author. My friend, who also runs our book club, has thousands of books, so I regularly grab huge stack so I’m never without essential, daily reading material.

    1. Vanessa Smith says: Reply

      They seem to be having a MASSIVE resurgence. I get it, things smell pretty. Calm down over them lol.
      I’ve been so bad at reading for the past year. Last year I had the excuse that I was studying but this year I just haven’t gotten back into it.

  2. Girl, you crack me up! 😀
    Great insights and ideas here. I think the mattress thing is hysterical! (My kids seem to have adopted this technique too!)
    I just need a school day, a clean house, exhaustion from doing everything with no assistance whatsover. Then it’s just myself and a rug on the sofa. It all flows from there…

    1. Vanessa Smith says: Reply

      Well I’m clearly a child at heart if the mattress works for kids too!

  3. Nothing beats a pyjama day, a sojourn on the couch and a Netflix (sorry) marathon. Anything that doesn’t require leaving the house gets my vote!

    1. Vanessa Smith says: Reply

      Netflix is awesome if you have good internet speeds! Ours is so-so.

  4. I am like you and prefer mattress to couch much to my husband’s annoyance. I choose to watch on my iPad in bed!! He likes being in the space of the living room

    Much of my self care is that lazy style and in my bedroom (my little cave)- I read, watch shows, draw, hang with my dogs etc. bliss

    1. Vanessa Smith says: Reply

      Mattresses are just that extra level of comfort!

  5. I’m a huge fan of lazing. We need it!

  6. You know yourself so well…and I wish you a MOST relaxing weekend on the mattress….doing your DVD thing. Enjoy!!! Denyse

  7. Have the best long weekend – I really hope it incorporates a lot of doing nothing.

  8. I love the odd day of lazing. I tend to surround myself with washing to fold so I don’t feel completely lazy! Today was of those days, just what I needed 🙂 hope you had some lazy days too xx #teamIBOT

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