When Do We Actually Need To Be Resilient?

I go through phases that are shitty, cranky inducing times of waking up WAY TOO EARLY. They always pass, but while it’s going on, it leaves me very tired and cranky. Which brings me to…


When Do We Actually Need To Be Resilient?


When Do We Actually Need To Be Resilient?


Having a lousy sleep before a Monday morning full of “inspiration” on the interwebs never bodes well for me. Inspiration tends to annoy me at the best of times. Waking up WAY TOO EARLY is not the best of times (in case that wasn’t obvious!) 


I’m sure that there would be things you could suggest to me about not sweating the small stuff. About mediation. Mindfulness. Things that contribute to resiliency, good moods and a general better than a cranky state-ed-ness. But here’s the thing. When this is happening, I don’t want to. I want to be allowed to be cranky at shitty sleep. 


I feel like there’s something missing in the balance of acknowledging your reality and seeking to improve your reality. Is resilience really for the small things or do need to save our bank of resiliency for the big things in life? 


What are your thoughts on when and how resiliency is best used?


19 Replies to “When Do We Actually Need To Be Resilient?”

  1. I don’t have a problem with moaning about the so-called small and shitty stuff. Like waking up too early. Maybe we flex our resilience muscle on this stuff so it’s better able to act when we really need it.

    1. Maybe, yep. It’s a warm up!

  2. Hmmmm interesting you write about this when I’m having a super challenging week and I’ve been very grumpy and tired too. I think to me resilience is about picking ourselves us when we’ve been knocked down (for whatever reason) and keeping on going … and that is what I’m hoping to do. Nothing wrong with a bit of a whinge though – I’m an expert at that BTW. lol! #TeamLovinLife

    1. Haha I am also expert at it 🙂

  3. Whinge away and enjoy it then move on to being resilient when you are ready. We all have down patches and not getting enough sleep is a key contributor.

    1. That’s a good point, maybe they are part of the same process.

  4. Acknowledging versus seeking to improve your reality, that’s a very important and sometimes difficult distinction and leap for me to make. I agree with Jan’s comment about being able to whinge and then move on to resilience when you are good and ready.

    SSG xxxx

    1. Yes, I guess if you don’t know you’re in a brief shitty period, you can’t change it.

  5. To me, I need resiliance for the tough things in life. Sure there will be days I feel frustrated or ‘shitty’ at the world but if it is over a little thing I just go with the flow and reserve my strength for when I need it. Thanks for the question and have a lovely day. xx

    1. Such great ideas coming from everyone – yes a good point not every day is fantastic and sometime we just roll with it.

  6. I’m trying really hard to be resilient at present because of the stress of moving house and trying find somewhere suitable to live for 6 months. Rentals are not easy to come by on the Gold Coast so it appears! I’m trying to keep things together but like you say when you’re not sleeping because of the worry it puts you in a crappy mood. #TeamLovinLife

    1. it is awful. We had to find something in a hurry when we sold in Sydney and needed to move to the Central Coast. We found something way over priced but settled to get it done. Unfortunately that house contributed to much of my feelings of isolation and change. I hope that you find “something suitable” but I know it’s hard. Always here for a whinge! Denyse x

      1. Moving is such a challenge 🙁 Fingers crossed you find something Kathy!

  7. Great conversations here and in the comments.

    I was a very harsh judge of myself until….cancer. Funny that. I have managed all that brought to me in a FAR better way than I did: 1. finishing up as a principal early and 2. all the transitions from Sydney to where we are now.

    BUT…there is always a BUT. If I had not gone through those major life experiences then what would I have known about myself. I took myself to task a lot but I also gently eased into learning more about ‘this being human stuff’ and for those I am very grateful.

    My cancer still is something that is a grind but I do wonder how I may have continued down the abyss of sadness and anxiety until it came around.

    Hoping things go better as time moves on. You have been under SOOOOO much inner stress from work, illness, home stuff and where to live next.

    Denyse x

    1. I do sometimes wish there was a way to get the strength we have without going through the bad stuff first. It’d be less tiring 🙂

  8. Oh, this is a hard one. I don’t know and think it varies from person to person. I know I wish I was more resilient in ways that would see me fall in an apathetic heap less often or deal with criticism or perceived criticism more.

    I think though it’s like a muscle and something we need to exercise and strengthen over time.

    1. I think it does vary, and for me probably also varies based on my mood!

  9. A thought provoking question. I think it’s hard to define when we should and should not be resilient. Instead I’ll say that sometimes it’s okay not to be – big or small.
    stopping via the LovinLife linkup.

    1. Good point!

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